The Dark Side of me

Saturday, August 15, 2009
Happiness! The word seemed almost elusive a few years back. I was naive then.Things have changed and so have my perception of the word. I have been longing to write something that inpires me, if not others.Something simple,something we all know and yet forget. A simple collection of thoughts.


It was in the month of september 2004 when I felt very indifferent. Callous would be the best fit. "Why the hell must I care if he lives or dies?" attitude was right at the top. And this continued till the demise of my grandfather. After that certain things changed and change was/is good. I realized that I wasn't an abnormal kiddo after all. It was just the pressure that I entrusted on myself during those two most pathetic years before college.

*Back to reality...
*Back to reality...

Death is strange and painful. The Silence.The monotonous feeling .The feeling of mortality.The fear. Dark clouds all over the head. But can death be blissful! Yes,it can. The suffering endured on earth may be even more than afterlife.Have you ever been down and depressed, felt that everything is running away from you and you inturn wanted a way out? Read on...(Rapid and random thoughts ahead; not for the faint hearted)
At times we think the world is against us and in those moments we are indeed weak,scared and ALONE. And one fine day everything is back to normal, we are happy and have that smile back. The cycle repeats once,twice,many times. After two or three rounds we get used to it and say "COME,WHAT MAY". We start wondering if there really exist any super-power.Is it even worth praying! So then what is happiness? Or for that matter, are we all in the pursuit of happiness?Or is it commonplace and too banal to discuss. Let's find out,shall we.

Happiness,a word has different meanings for different beings. Random thoughts can give a slightly explicit picture. For convinence I would like to use and twist the (happiness) word as i wish,pardon me. Happiness is not permanent ; happiness is when I pour out the secrets to someone sincerely willing to spare his heart and ears; happiness is when I bunk classes and tests and spend memorable time with friends and family at the theatres or on the playgound ; happiness is when I wake up in the morning only to find out that everything is well and my morning tea is hot and ready ;happiness is when I kick some butt in video games; happiness is when we are we and not I ; happiness is and will be what I perceive it to be. Is it really that simple? Yes,my friend,it is. You have every right to smile and laugh and so do I. So next time when people sitting next to you laugh, don't laugh for the sake of laughing! You have every right to BE YOURSELF. What happens if happiness becomes a routinue :) ! Then it is no longer happiness and we go searching for something new.

Some say an optimist is one who sees the positive side of the half-filled glass .Clearly the optimist is one who sees only the good side of life .In that case those some remain satisfied with the minimal possible ,I think. Did i just say that! NO,I scribbled it down :). Why not think like a pessimist all the possible (bad)outcomes and then work towards whatsoever undertaken like an optimist. Ironic !

Is there be a place worse than EARTH! Or can there be a place as divine and green as our mother earth? Confused?Let me conclude by saying that if you are under the conception that earth is heaven and we have to face the (hardrock)music after death somwhere worse, welcome to the Optimist group. :D


IF your head is in terrible pain,am sorry.
Please don't worry;
Watch tom or jerry.
Stop pondering over the above text,
I say this for your best.


Neeru said...

How interesting, Nitin. And how original, the way you define Happiness. :) Lovely writing, it's lovely to watch your writing mature with each post! Go on, keep writing!

Shera said...

Wow!! Truly Spell Bound:)